My Brain Needs an Off Switch

My Brain Needs an Off Switch

Seriously.  If we could have the ability to just flick a switch to stop ourselves from thinking even for an hour, I would do it in a heartbeat.  Here is what goes through my mind in any given hour:  

Do I have food in my teeth?  I wish my allergies would let up.  I have to get my wrists checked.  I think I have carpal tunnel.  Or arthritis.  Darn dog walking all those years!  Not that I didn’t love it.  I wonder if I’ll ever find a job I love.  Does that even exist?  I wonder if our new neighbors will be non-smokers.  Please God, let them be non-smokers, non drug users.  Please.  What if we have nightmare neighbors again?  Did I pay this bill?  I forgot to call ____.  I really have to deposit $ in a bank.  I wish I was paid more.  I’m not making enough for the years experience working I have.  Will I ever get pregnant?  It hasn’t been long at all but feels like forever with each passing month.  I hope Gorilla is okay.  I hope she isn’t bored out of her mind.  Well [that] was rude.  I pray our cars dont break down.  We’ll need a new car soon.  I really need to get my car door fixed.  Somebody is in a crabby mood today.  I wish I could take a vacation.  Our bank account is getting low.  I’m freaking out again.  Should I ask for a raise?  I think the Hawks will win again.  I think Saad is kind of hot.  I’m looking forward to our weekend getaway in 2 months.  I nailed that presentation.  I need to repaint my toes.  What should we have for dinner?  I have to take the towels out of the dryer.  I have to call _____.  Oooh! A wedding announcement.  The last wedding we went to was so fun.  Still didn’t get a thank you card from the 800 person wedding/concert/show.  People are so rude when they don’t send thank you cards for wedding gifts.  I better see where they are registered.  I have to make plans with the bestie.  It’s been way too long.  Ugh, when???  No time!  I miss my bestie and my brother.  I never see them.  She has cute shoes on.  I’m hungry.  I really need to start working out.  Gotta get out the bike again.  That trail was great.  I gotta put a reminder in my phone for _____.

And so it goes.  For real.  I could be doing 4 different tasks at once and somehow even if I’m not consciously thinking of all these things they are always in the back of my mind.  But most of the time I am consciously thinking all this.  95% of my thoughts are worries, fears, mostly irrational some rational.  Am I the only one who has this?  I’m amazed sometimes I can remember anything with all this information on a loop in my brain. 

Just switch me off like a light please.    

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